Thursday, February 23, 2012

(Day 53) This too shall pass.

It's a flaw of human nature to feel like whatever hard thing we are enduring, will last forever. That nothing will change and we are stuck in the hardship we are facing. I like to think of it as: we are blinded by the darkness of a temporary trial and can't see the fact that there is, indeed, light beaming at the end of the tunnel. 
That blindness sucks. Can I get an "amen"?
If I have learned anything through my 2 years of parenthood it is this: This too shall pass.
I have been thinking about this phrase a lot lately. As a lot of people can attest, I am in the hard part of parenting. The grunt work. The sleep training 2 babies at the same time. Teaching my 6 month old how to take a bottle. Teaching her how to eat solids. Teaching my 2 year old to be obedient and to share. Trying to make things for dinner that my 2 year old will allow near his face. Cleaning the house as said toddler runs behind me undoing everything I clean. Trying to juggle 2 very different sleeping schedules everyday. Making all of this work in a tiny apartment. All that "fun" stuff. 
But having done all those things for the past 2 years straight, I have come to realize something. This too shall pass. The baby will eventually sleep without her swaddle. The toddler will eventually eat. The house will eventually stay clean (even if it's only for minutes). Eventually, the grunt work will be over. I refuse to be blinded by the sometimes tempting mindset that things won't change and the "hard" will always continue. Cause that thought is more daunting than the actual work.
And obviously, this doesn't apply just to parenting. For example: Richard is still in school and I need to remind myself, that one day he will be in a job he loves with awesome hours. The crazy school schedule will end. This applies to everything in life. Everything hard. Don't allow the human tendency of feeling like the hard won't end take away the beautiful fact that there is light gleaming ahead of you. 
Little man in mid-jump while we were puddle jumping...taken with my phone
Because it all will end.
Not just the hard, but all of it. 
The hard and the wonderful that is simultaneously occurring along with the "dark". Get what I am saying? It's a round-about thought I  have been constantly trying to remind myself of thinking about a lot and wanted to share, but it's sort of hard to convey.
While the hardship and the grunt work is occurring, there are specks, large and small, of glorious moments of beauty that will also end with the stage of life you are in. Because it all ends. That's the double edged sword of it all passing.
So while eventually my kids will sleep, eat and learn to share, they will also stop needing me, stop loving me completely unconditionally, stop needing me to kiss their owies, stop needing me to come and give them hugs after nightmares, stop giving me slobbery kisses and stop needing me as much as they do now. Eventually Richard will have an awesome job he loves, but he will also stop having the flexibility to come home after classes for lunch for hours if he is ahead, or leave for the day at 10-11 and we will have to live a normal 8-5pm tax-paying-mortgage-slaved adult life.
My point: Not only is there light at the end of the tunnel, but there is also light in  the tunnel. 
And that is a light I wouldn't miss for anything.
So while I take comfort in the fact that 
This too shall pass,
I must remember that not only will the hardships that might be present end,
but also the wonderful that occur right along side the hard.
If anyone reads this:
Whats the light in your tunnel?
And if you aren't sure, ask someone not in your situation. The grass is always greener on the other side :)


Anyways, thought I would share the thoughts I am having. Because who knows. Maybe somewhere, someone might need the same pep talk I am giving myself. 
...I seem to do a lot of pep talking to myself...o my. Pathetic? Maybe.

5 comments:

  1. Smell of newborns, cuddling with one of the world's sweetest little boy, and day dates with the hubby.

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  2. Rocking my baby, soft baby cheeks, and short days (for the hubby) at school.

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  3. My amazing, intelligent, fun, spiritual, hot wife. Liams enthusiasm. Brielles smiles.

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  4. Love this! Mckenna, I have too thought about all the good stuff passing along with the hard. I often wonder what I missed out on the years of my life I spent only focusing on the struggles. Sure motherhood is hard, moms are tired, simple things become hard to do when your little ones are at your feet but I wouldn't trade ANY OF IT!! and as hard as it can be somedays, I still just want to slow down time so I can spend every single minute loving these babies!! Thanks so much for your thoughts!!

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  5. I loved this Mckenna. And you wrote it so beautifully. This is something I've thought a lot about lately and an idea that has changed my perspective continually as I work as a mother. I've gone from episodes of feeling suffocated by the "darkness" (crazy, intense-ness of motherhood) to now basking in the "light" (awe and beauty and enjoyment of it all) almost continually. There are always intense moments, but my change in perspective has made all the difference in what I was choosing to see in my life. Can I just say, I absolutely LOVE being a mom. And knowing "this too shall pass" makes me stay in moments longer, stare at my kids more often, soak it all in as much as I can. I'm not perfect at it and often I let the grunt work take over my focus, but all I have to remember is, "this too shall pass" and I stop and stare, and enjoy, and smile.

    The light in my tunnel is so many things. It's the girls singing to themselves this morning while they colored, them wrestling together on the bed making each other laugh hysterically, folding cute little girl shirts, doing their hair in pigtails and curls, listening to 3 and 5 year old antics, looks across the room between Chad and I as we both acknowledge something funny or cute one of the girls has done, tiny voices, little arms around my neck and tiny kisses. It's all of this and a million more things. I know it's going to pass and I'm going to miss this. I honestly find comfort in believing there's gotta be some kind of home video system up in heaven where we can go back and watch and remember all of these moments.

    Thanks for your insight kenna. You're awesome: )

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